is it rocket science? is it the theory of relativity? no. but how come we still get sick?
Classics 101: Great Expectations
emphasis on the EX. because no, we are not taking about the book, although the author, charles dickens, plays quite a part. the first four letters of his last name anyway.
excuse me for the wrong spelling. wrong vowel, extra b. it should be spelled the habit. the word which could be a last name, and the ONLY first names it could have would be either good, or bad.
i’ve been asked all kinds of questions from how’s your day? to what are you?. it’s usually easy to answer how’s your day with “hwe” or blah, especially if someone asks me this question just about everyday. what are you i was asked way back, and i felt so smug when i answered, a human being. i know she, (of course it was a she), was asking about my ethnicity. it has been my experience that it depended on which store i was, and i would be always be mistaken as an employee because of the way i look. so anyway, i gave this lady a short history lesson, and a little manners lesson.
first dates. we all want it to be perfect – right dress, great make up, cosy place, gq cover looking date. it’s going really well, you just can’t stop staring at his beautiful eyes and piano keys choppers. with matching deep throated voice that sends chills down your spine especially that he is the only one who seems to say your name the way you want it. he also looks at you deeply and doesnt seem to notice the other women batting their damn those are loonggg lashes at him.
so, i had a flat tire. g.i. jane that i thought i was, i googled how to change a tire, the girly girl way. unrolling my nonexistent sleeves, i started to do the job. when i put the thingamabob on the whatchamacallit, it would not budge. i think if i had hemorrhoids at that time they would have popped. so that was that. my landlord came home, he saw what was happening, and rolling his existent sleeves, he easily changed my tire.
no one likes to talk about teeth, except the dentist and his hygienist. why wouldn’t they? them teeth, brushed, flossed or not, pay for the golf clubs and hair extensions.
did you hear? the blue men team has a new member. me. they might scramble to change the name to blue people team because my anatomy is completely different from theirs. nothing hangs.
what are the odds that friday the 13th would be the day before valentines? uhhhh scary! in 24 hours we go from jason to cupid! from machete to love arrows! from scary hockey goalie mask to chubby cheeks! from dickie pants to cloth diaper! let me stop.
ever heard of the little girl who cried because she had no high heeled shoes until she saw another little girl with no feet? have you been that little girl? or little boy for that matter, only with air jordans?